11 Oct About Death

What do we know about death? In our opinion, it is the end of the road, darkness… They have been writing, painting and singing about it… It has been eternal inspiration and eternal secret…

I remember my childhood thoughts and attempts to describe the feeling that I did not exist. If I had not been born, where would have I been? Anywhere? Somewhere? Would have I seen this world with my non-physical eyes, from somewhere… from the Universe?

We are born and we die… We die and we are born. Cycles. We can find them in nature and we are less aware that they are within us… We die a bit every day… Symbolically and literally… We change… Our cells die and new ones are born.

Now when I have gone through a variety of seminars, educations, life experiences, as a psychotherapist, who works with people, I know that death is a part of Life… That when a physical body disappears, the Being does not. I know that I am more than this body, which changes, ages and dies… I know, but, however… It is extremely difficult to accept death as a part of one’s path…   The inevitability of death, leaving everything here and going to a place that is unfamiliar… Accept and even celebrate this rebirth, spirit’s liberation from its matter…

We get attached to each other. We get attached to what we see, touch… We pay a lot of attention to things, bodies, houses, pleasures, old uncomfortable shoes, places, people and familiar surroundings, which we do not find pleasant anymore.

Even those small deaths that happen during our way… It is difficult when we need to get rid of our old habits, to leave our childhood places, houses where we used to live… Nevertheless, does it really die? Does a child have to die in order for a woman to be born? No, they just grow up and thus change… and then we try another pair of shoes. In fact, nothing dies by disappearing. It changes and transforms. Change is the only thing that is true and certain. Being fixed is death…

Thus I testify a variety of changes I have experienced… I have the feeling that I am leaving something pleasant, familiar… something that is dying, disappearing… and thus I am scared. However, what comes creates excitement, even joy. Firstly, you have to endure everything between, cross the river, which separates two coasts.

In order to understand and accept death, I rely on the symbols and archetypes of initiation tarot.  What I need is something that goes beyond ratio and intellectuality. Pictures and symbols are the key. The archetype of death…  Map XIII – Crossing (D, Didier, Initiation Tarot Expert). Its name itself makes me feel relaxed… Even though there is a black figure, which causes discomfort, similar to death performances I have seen before, I can observe it. With its clear presence, it talks about its inevitability, while driving the boat in a slow manner towards the other side of coast. Green water, orange circles of purgatory… In the distance, there are arches, temple pillars and lights… Something is sailing towards it… What is that?

I am observing colours and characters in the picture; I can feel weakness in my legs and cramps in my stomach… My sight has become blurred; my fears have become stronger… All past situations come out, uneasiness is there, lakes intensify… I decide not to stop what is moving… It is time to turn, to move, to cut all ties from the past using old ways… It is time to face the fears and sadness, acceptable experiences in which I was hurt and leave them behind and free myself. I see this picture as my support… I feel it feeds me. A rafter knows what he is doing, he doses security… while he is driving the boat slowly, I feel that it is time for re-examination… forgiveness…

“Break up with your past, leaving no unresolved issues behind yourself. The radical change of lifestyle with others and in everyday life. Liberation, renewal, death for rebirth. Spiritual evolution, universal evolution, inner truth and self-work. Transmutation, initiation death” (D. Didier, Initiation Tarot Master)

I again feel that excitement of standing in front of something unknown… new roads… new opportunities… chances… possibilities… As a child… I am born in myself… Grateful for that opportunity… Now… Tomorrow… Again…

When we discuss death in a psychological sense, we usually talk about the death of ego, that little man inside us, who classifies, defines, categorise, names, assesses, controls… The death of what we know about ourselves and our readiness to destroy the image, we have previously made (about ourselves and the world around us), and create a new one. In addition, our readiness to erase our borders in order to merge with others, indulging in something unfamiliar, something bigger than us that makes us feel afraid…

An anxious person who is constantly in fear of death may have trouble falling asleep even though fatigue overcomes it. They are unable to retreat and surrender to the unknown of their dreams. For some people, staying in retreat when one cycle (of contact) is over, and before a new figure appears, can be a big challenge. Stay in what we call a fertile void. It simply means “being there”, in full self-awareness in the world. When they appear in a therapy session, it can be the place of creative indifference in which we sit with the client, in a state of wakefulness and availability, ready to respond to the emerging figure. It is a time when it is necessary to be non-directive and admit the unknown. It can be a simultaneous surrender to that organic self-regulatory process and surrender to the spiritual dimension. (Ph. Joyce & Ch. Sils, Skills in Gestalt Counseling & Psychotherapy)

I’m still looking at the tarot card Crossing, the rafter figure tells me something else – we need to go a step further, change the vision of death.

I recognize the weight of our customs related to death, mourning and all actions during the farewell… Ancient nations, especially Indian tribes, looked at death on the bright side, perhaps because of the connection with nature that they celebrated.

The Desano community of the Amazon rainforest of eastern Colombia believes that if there were no deaths among the Desano people, no deer, turtles, birds, or other inhabitants of the tropical rainforest wouldn’t be born. Because the whole living world is fed from the same reservoir of spiritual and biological energy… For the Australian tribes (Murngin and other natives), the country itself is a living, always accessible repository of their memories of the order of the Time of Creation that maintained them for a long time. Similar to the areas of the brain that chemically encode and store memories, this country is a reservoir of the past – filled with mysterious messages, allusions and moral reminders from the Dream era0. This is illustrated by the questions Murngin asks when he meets another person: “What water do you come from?” – asking in which sacred territory she was biologically conceived, and then: “Where is the land of your bones?” which refers to the sacred territory of his hereditary totem clan. (P. Knutson and D. Suzuki, The Wisdom of the Elders: Native and Scientific Ways of Understanding Nature).

I feel my physical body, made up of the same elements that make up the planet… It belongs to the planet… I feel the earth beneath my feet, Mother Earth… It gives life and is sustained by our continual deaths… ”Let us take awareness of the joy of one entity for rebirth on the side of the weft’s face, this joy is the consciousness of eternal life. Let’s take the awareness of the body’s pleasure to enter the earth. By becoming a substance, the body enables the maintenance of the mother planet. ”(D. Didier, Master’s Initiation Tarot, Mercia du Lac).

Changing the vision of death means recognizing how inextricably linked we are to everything around us, to nature, plants, animals, the entire planet, the Sun … And then I realize that there really is no death. Because I continue to live through a tree, a rose, a child, a woman, a man… I flow with the river and breathe with the wind..on this side, and I exist with all the experiences of life on the other side ..

I continue to feed this vision. The days come when I fall into oblivion again, and let that sadness and fear overwhelm me when I hear about someone who has left … And I rise again and connect, with myself and everything, here and there ..

“Live your life so that the fear of death never enters your heart. Do not burden anyone because of their faith, respect other people’s opinions and ask them to respect yours. Love your life, perfect it and beautify everything around you. Strive to live long and in the service of your people. Prepare a sublime song of death for the day when you will cross over. ”(Chief Tecumseh, Shawnee)